New Year's Bonus: Setting Goals that Align with Your Soul's Purpose - Transcript

Anna: Good morning, Kristina. Good morning. And good morning to our listeners happy new year, happy new year. We know that some of you celebrate Jewish new year in Chinese new year, but we can still. 

Kristina: Let's, let's celebrate the Gregorian new year.

Anna: It's just a symbolic thing. Come on, baby. I love symbols. So speaking of new year's Kristina, what is your, what do you think about new year's resolution? Some people are pro some people are against them. Some people don't like the word resolutions, like, what are you.

Anna: What's 

Kristina: your, I love any time period in which you resolve to do something, but with my ADHD and my executive function, like I'm not even going to label it. I'm just going to say I'm absolute shit at holding new year's resolutions, like of heading any resolution longer than a day. Like I did the hard 75 and it was like more like the hard 25, you know, like it's just a hard, 75 is like 75 days in which you drink a gallon of water.

Kristina: You exercise for two 30 minute sessions a day or 45 minute sessions a day, depending on which type you're doing, you read 10 pages of a nonfiction book a day, and then you can add anything. 

Anna: Shit you 

Kristina: gotta make. You gotta make the hard 75. It's called the hard 75 for a reason, but like I got through 25 days of it.

Kristina: And then I really loved it in those 25 days. But then my bra, I just like, forget, like I have my reward center, doesn't understand. The benefit of exercise. So I never fucking exercise, like, whereas I listened to you, like when you made me exercise, when we used to meet for those like one day a week, that was like the most exercise I had ever done cumulatively in my life.

Anna: I love exercising. Well, I'm a physical therapist, so duh, but I love exercising and Eric got us a Peloton for black Friday and I love it. Like, I didn't know the allure of a Peloton. , I hate cycling classes. I'll just put it out there. I hate cycling classes. I like bike riding, but I have a fear of bikes.

Anna: Cause my friend's dad died. He got hit by a car on a bike. And so ever since then, I don't like to get out on the road and That's a really long answer to the fact that I finally understand why everyone who has a Peloton loves it because I told myself I'm going to do it twice a week for this year.

Anna: And then I actually am doing it every single day. Like boom, streak. I love it. So great. So the coaches are like therapists, the instructors, , they give life advice, not life advice, but they're just. They're just so motivational. They're like, you're here on the bike and this is 30 minutes for you.

Anna: Don't think about anyone else. Think about only you and this is for you. And then they pick like inspirational songs. And during the songs they're like, they're like, you know, you're going to have a challenge today and how you tackle it on the bike right now is how you're going to tackle your challenges later on in the day.

Anna: So why don't you push through this one? And like, they just kind of sets you up for a really winning mindset and. I like it. These instructors are just amazing. That's cool 

Kristina: for Peloton bikes, 

Anna: Peloton, if you want to be our sponsor, you 

Kristina: know? Yeah. Like that's. Yeah. So, so you have two opposite sides of the spectrum.

Kristina: Right now. You have Anna who loves to exercise and keeps her resolutions and is incredibly disciplined about doing things. And then you have Kristina who literally. Lovably and degenerates, 

Anna: and then durably the door 

Kristina: bubbly doesn't stick to any of her resolutions continually has good ideas, but then doesn't have the energy, which is probably honestly a human disease.

Kristina: So 

Anna: people listening, you fall into one of the spectrums of here. We were at both on opposite ends of the bell curve. Exactly. So what I wanted to talk about today in honor of new year's was how to set some really good goals.

Anna: So in the Silva mind control, there is a day where we talk about goals and the teacher, Vishen Lakhiani talks about how previously everyone understood the concept of law of attraction, which is unless you've been living under a rock.

Anna: We'll have known by now about the secret and the law of attraction and like making a vision board and whatever you want, you can attract by believing in it and focusing positive thoughts on it and all that jazz. Now he says that there is an evolution and that the guy who originally spoke about that in the law of attraction.

Anna: In the movie, the secret Michael Beckwith has kind of changed his belief now. And it's more the law of resonance. So the law of resonance is not, you attract what you want. The law is you attract what you are. Kristina. Do you want to talk a little bit about that? 

Kristina: Yeah. What part of it? Well, I've been living under a rock in the sense that I've never read this.

Kristina: So it's interesting for me because I've learned everything that I know from the law of attraction from you, Anna. And from actually there's a couple of different, like manifesting courses I've done that have kind of, again, variations of this idea of like, trans surfing for instance talks about how you should visualize a slide of what you want, but be empty.

Kristina: In your craving or a version for us. Right. So you're empty and like not wanting it to happen or wanting it to happen. And then imagine what it feels like to be in that slide. Right. So that you're bringing the emotion into that experience. There's another woman named Lacey Phillips who has a website called to be magnetic.

Kristina: And she talks about how with attraction, it has. A couple of different, really key things like it has to have an engine behind it. So it has to have a motivation. Then you also have to have expanders in your life, people around you who are showing you the energy resonance of what you're trying to attract and things like that.

Kristina: So I know some of the derivations of the law of attraction. And, but that foundational piece is, is obviously. 

Anna: Yeah. Well, and the idea of the law of resonance is that you, instead of attracting what you want, you attract what you are. And I really liked that because Vishen talks about how Tony Robbins says that the soul has two desires in life.

Anna: It has a desire for growth, and it has a desire for contribution. And a great example of that is someone say is a you know, Ultra rich millionaire, billionaire, and they're completely sad. They're depressed. Like the haves and the have-nots like the, the, the person who quote unquote has it all is depressed and sad.

Anna: Why? Because if they're not growing or they're not contributing their soul kind of Withers, you know, it's like, it's not enough to have what you want. It's about is your soul growing and is, or I'm sorry, are you growing and are you contributing to the world in a meaningful way? And the Shen goes on to say that basically the universe, like the law of attraction universe is going to fully support you.

Anna: If your goal includes growing and contribution. Cause that's what we're here to do. Like there's a great quote from Eckhart Tolle. Which is the universe is not here to make you happy. The universe is here to make you conscious. So if you can say, okay, well, I really want this car because it's going to make me happy.

Anna: But instead, if you have this idea, like, I really want this car because I will grow as a more diligent, more loving, more patient, more amazing person, cause in order to afford that car, I'm going to have to make changes in my career, which are great for my group. And I'm going to contribute because this car is going to help me take my mother to the hospital and this car is going to contribute because it's going to , inspire people who see me drive this car to grow as well.

Anna: I mean, that's a silly example, but like, if you can take something that you want because you think it's gonna make you happy. Well, no, whatever you want, it's not there to make you happy. It's there to make you more conscious. And what does conscious growth and contribution, right? 

Kristina: Another way you could say that is.

Kristina: If the thing that you want is there to fill a hole, then you're likely not going to get it because the hole is most likely endless. But if the thing that you want is there to make you more whole or realize that you're already whole right. Which is just what consciousness is, is just unveiling, what you already know and making you aware of it, then that's going to be a more aligned manifestation.

Kristina: That's more likely to. 

Anna: Right envision so something beautiful. He says, anytime you're trying to imagine fulfilling a goal or seeing a goal realized you need to imagine two or more people benefiting from this, which is the contribution factor, which I love, because in a way he's saying don't be so selfish.

Anna: You know, if you want, you know, I'm manifesting a million dollars. Well, why, you know, see two or more people benefiting from you getting that million dollars maybe. Send two people to college. Maybe you you donate something, but the point is, is like, you want to share that with others. And what's beautiful about that is that Matt Khan talks a lot about.

Anna: The law of attraction actually is a reflection of your whole with H O L E. So it's a belief in scarcity. So usually what we're trying to manifest is, is coming from this place within a saying, I lack, I lack, I lack I don't have. And if I did have that, I wouldn't be happy, but the Shen is saying, well, if you want this thing to contribute to others, it no longer is really coming from a scarcity thing.

Anna: It's coming from a loving thing. Like, Hey, I really want our podcast to hit number one on the charts, because I want it to touch so many more people's lives so that more and more people can learn to love their shadow. And I can imagine seeing thousands of people benefiting from our podcast. And that is so much more meaningful than me being like, well, I want our podcast to hit number one, because then I got to put it on my resume or whatever.

Anna: I mean, whatever 

Kristina: validating or 

Anna: whatever it is. Right? Yeah. So you get the idea. So what Michelle talks about and I've put a free PDF. On our website, you can find it on our show notes or how to do this is to make three columns in the first column you put experiences and the second column you put growth, and then the third you put contribution.

Anna: So I'll give you an example, let's say on the experience list, you say meeting my soulmate and getting married. Okay. That's an experience I really want to have, I really want to get married. He also talks a lot in the course about. True desires and manufacturer desire. So maybe, maybe you don't really want to get married.

Anna: You're secretly lesbian. You're secretly by your secretly, Polly. You're secretly all these other things, but society has brainwashed you into thinking that happiness is going to come. When you get married, you need to really analyze your. The experiences you want to have, are they really coming from deep within you or are they societally manufactured?

Anna: Okay. So let's, let's just start there. You need to be careful that what you want asking for, you're asking for the job and the 2.5 children and the white picket fence. Is that something your soul really wants? Do you really have a desire for that? Or is that just something you've been taught that you need to have?

Anna: Okay. Okay. Side point. Yeah. Now let's say you've dug deep and you really didn't want to meet your soulmate and get married. So that's the experience you want to have. So then you go into the next column, which would be growth. Okay. You want an awesome soulmate person who never cheats and never lies and is financially stable and this and that, whatever.

Anna: Okay. Growth. Who do you need to become to attract someone like that? If you don't have integrity, if you're a cheater, if you're a liar, if you don't have your shit together, what makes you think that. You're going to attract that what you want, you need to rise up. So there's the growth factor. So you make a list then of how are you going to grow to become that person, that the ideal soulmate version that you want would actually want to be with?

Anna: Let's be honest. Let's let's be honest, you know, you want your prince charming. All right. You gotta be Cinderella. And who was Cinderella? She was a person who was so fucking awesome that even the animals loved her. Okay. So, you know, you want your prince charming rise up and be your Cinderella. I'm not saying wash dishes and clean up the house.

Anna: I'm saying she embodied. Divine love, but to the fact that even rats wanted to hang out with her. Okay. 

Kristina: Right. And that's what Laura Day talks about in our other bonus as well. When our, when we had our Thanksgiving bonus Laura Day talked a lot about this as like, you know, it's all good, well, and good to say, like, this is the partner that I want, but like, how are you gonna to grow, to meet, to match that?

Kristina: And of course, This is all captured. The fact that we talk about growth is just the unveiling of, of shadow and the recognition and like processing of shadow or life. It's not about fixing yourself to be the person that you need to be. And so we need to be very clear that it's like, it's, it's the process saying that to work and all that kind of 

Anna: stuff.

Anna: We're not saying. And pretend to be amazing. We're saying, you know, become that you want someone to love you unconditionally become a person who loves unconditionally. That's essentially. Yeah. And then in the third column you have your contribution. So in that situation you would think, okay, well, who is going to, how am I going to contribute to the world by meeting my soulmate and getting married?

Anna: Well, for one, I'm going to make my soulmate happy for number two, . I'm going to have children that are going to benefit from us being together.

Anna: I'm going to inspire my best friend. Who's given up on love. I'm going to inspire people to believe in love because I'm going to share my love with others or whatever. So you just take your experience, you look at how you need to grow, to become that, which attracts that because it's a lot of resonance, not law of attraction.

Anna: And then you're going to look at how you contribute to at least to our other people. And we will put that in the show notes because that's just a great way to set up your vision board. And then one more, little thing to add to this is that vision discusses. There's three steps to your goals, which is desire, which needs to be a burning real desire.

Anna: Something you really want. It's not because society told you you needed it. You're not fulfilling your family's desire that you get married and have the 2.5 children. No, it's something coming deep within your soul. And that might look different for everybody. It might not be that. How it might be, I'm going to, I mean, I don't know what it is, but you pick the thing that your soul is calling.

Anna: That's your true burning desire, whatever that might be. The second step of that is you have belief. You believe you're going to get it. You believe you're going to grow. You believe you're going to contribute and you believe it. And the third one is expectation. You expect it is going to happen.

Anna: Sam Walton, who was one of the most. He's a controversial person, the Walmart guy. Yeah. But he was one of the most successful American business people. And when he was interviewed, one of the reasons why he said that he was so successful is that he always expected for everything to work out. And then he operated from a mindset of, of expecting success and expecting everything to flow.

Anna: The point being. Desire belief and expectation. And then for those of you who like new year's resolutions, or just like to make goals, you can set up a little vision board and make your list, and you can have your experiences that you're looking for, how you're going to grow to become that, which attracts that and how you're going to contribute to the universe.

Anna: To make it happen. Yeah. 

Kristina: From the perspective really quickly, I, can I just add something about expectation real quick? I didn't want to mess up your flow. With expectation. I, it's always funny because every single one of these things has a little bit of like a Razor's edge.

Kristina: Right? So with desire, for instance, like we talk about craving and aversion and all these different things in Buddhism and how it's like you can't, you can't want it. You can't want it to fill a hole and blah, blah, blah, blah. Expectation also kind of has this interesting thing where you can really deepen the practice of expectation.

Kristina: One of the things that I learned from my dowsing teacher that he does every day, he's a farmer and what he does every day is he pictures everything in his day, going. Right. He just like sits there in the morning and you know, a lot of us, if we get sidetracked from our meditation or if we're just recognizing our thoughts as part of our meditation we'll start catastrophizing things that could happen during the day.

Kristina: Right. But instead, just managing the day by basically saying, I'm going to imagine, like harvesting all these tomatoes in a really easy way. And I'm gonna imagine that all my tools work and all the different things like that. And that's another way of, of. Creating an expectation of like, this is what it looks like.

Kristina: I'm visualizing it. And again, we can go to professional athletes, they do the same thing they imagine and visualize themselves winning a race. Right. And it feels so familiar and we're kind of doing it over and over again, such that you can kind of create an even deeper practice of expertise. I 

Anna: love that.

Anna: And I wanted to add one more little comment, this whole thing, which was that vision talks about how he used the Silva mind control method to imagine and visualize Keeling his vision as a teenager, and it didn't work. So then he decided he was going to tackle a different goal. That was easier, which was his acne.

Anna: And he did, he got his acne, his cystic acne. Fast forward years later, he's like, I'm going to try to heal my vision again. I wasn't successful before. Let me try it this time. So he started to doing his manifestation exercises to heal his vision. And guess what? Like within a week or so he sees a poster on a subway advertising Lasix.

Anna: Like it was, this is, I don't remember what year it was, but it was like just when Lasix was coming out, laser surgery. So he goes, he visits the doctor and within an hour, his vision is forever fixed and he says, That just keep in mind that when you are trying to manifest something or heal something and attract something, it might not come to you in the way that you think it will.

Anna: So for example, he was expecting to miraculously heal his vision. He did heal his vision, but he did have to pay for it. So sometimes the answer to your prayers is going to come to you in a way you didn't expect maybe it's medication. You know, you're trying to heal X, Y, or Z. And then your doctor says, look, there's new medication.

Anna: That's just come up. Or this surgery is just now available. Maybe that is the answer to your prayer. Just remember there's a cute little parable. We've all heard where the man's drowning and someone tries to throw them a life S and then a speed boat comes by and he says, no, no, no, I'm waiting for God.

Anna: God's going to save me. And then another cruise ship comes by. He's like, no, no, I'm waiting for God. God's gonna save me any die. Then he goes to heaven when he gets there, he's like, God, I was waiting. Why didn't you save me? He did. I said, he's like, I sent you the lady with the life vest. I sent you the speed boat.

Anna: I sent you the cruise boat, but you didn't take them. So just keep in mind that when you are manifesting things and you are attracting things, it might not come to you in the form that you think your soulmate might not look the way that you thought he was. He might be from a totally different background or race or religion or whatever.

Anna: Or, you know, the acne that you're trying to heal on your face might come in the form of a wonderful new serum or cream that someone randomly gives to you, Just, just be open that the signs are there, the things are coming. And one beautiful way you can keep this going is he says you could have a magic journal.

Anna: And every night before you go to bed, you write on the top of this journal. And it says the magic that I saw in the world today was, and you write down anything that was magical or synchronistic or beautiful. , how it came to you that day. When you focus on the magic, that's happening in your life, you are opening yourself up to more magic and you're going to see more synchronicities and you're going to tune it more to being available and recognizing when these gifts are given to us, because our prayers will be answered.

Anna: We just maybe need to be a little more perceptive and see the signs and recognize when they're there. Yeah. All right. Well, happy new year, everybody happy new year.